parasite is a post industrial electropop album by ada rook, having to be one of my favorite albums ever. i think this album is about feeling lost, pain, suffering. it feels very dissociated and i love that. this album is so personal but that makes me feel more understood. this is a very good follow up to shed blood, and i even think it's way better than that album. this album is so simple but i know the background is so much more complex than that.

the production can be rather strange at times, but that's one of the things i really like about it. it feels so homemade and special. this album focuses on an empty and unfocused, uncomfortable atmosphere. being very candid in it's nature, it describes the feeling of moving on after something painful and the feelings after that. it's so raw and true to me, i enjoy it so much. the album feels messy and abrasive, stripped down, but i feel it fits. she talks about wanting to be forgotten, wanting to leave the world, as if she doesn't belong here, which is one of my favorite things she touches on. feeling otherworldly and empty, having nothing here for you, the most painful feeling you can have after traumatic events. she also represents anxiety very well in her writing. even after this, you can still feel her hope in the closing tracks, which are kind of abrasive to me but again i think it fits what this album is about.

if you couldn't tell, i am in love with the writing and everything. ada's writing is my biggest inspiration, she's able to convey panic, pain, feeling inhuman, she's able to convey it all so well. my favorite thing about her music, this album in specific, is the atmosphere that i feel so much. both of these things make this album very personal to me. i feel parasite so much, that's why it's close to my heart. you can feel the pain in these songs, in the most beautiful way. so really this album is so cathartic to me, it makes me feel so comforted and finally understood.

the instrumentalism is very special and satisfying in this album, such as in the title track, with smooth swells in the chorus and the strange melody moving so smoothly in between. the instrumental present in this album, ok, is one of the first songs i've heard off of it a few years ago. it's so sweet but somber, it reminds me of walking in a lonely dark night and i love it so much. i love the pianoooo aaaghhhh.

my favorite track is somehow. it feels so, i guess, empty and desperate and i LOVE IT!!! this song makes me cry soemtimes It Is. so perfect. and pretty. the lyrics are my favorite part. honestly i don't know how to talk about this song without being extra personal but my point is this song is awesome i love it ok..

so of course, the reason i love this album so much is because i think it represents trauma and the manifestation of it so well. revisiting it and trying to overcome it, the pain and giving up. in such a lonely time i come to this album and it comforts me, i'm so glad she made this album. i'm so glad she feels comfortable enough to talk about these personal topics, who knows who else feels the same way as me. her writing always feels so personal and comforting to me, i feel like this album came from my head.

"it's what you know but can't say
it burns all your healing away
stripping bare the bones of
what you thought you had to be" - host

"i know that deep inside there's just disease
a wound inside a rotting memory
but amidst the wreckage and the sparks and blood
i can still find faces and names that i love
for all my cold lugubriosity
i just want you to be happy with and without me." - disease

"i don't wish things had been better
i wish i'd died
i wish there was nothing
to connect me to that life
i can't convey the hate i have for who i used to be
i wanna wreck her mind
so she won't have the chance to become me" - damage

"can i ever be whole again
or is this it?
crying in your arms again
and hating it
i'm carving at my soul
to make it fit
cut my skin away
so i can live" - somehow