11.02.23

we meet again momolover nation. GOD i'm sooo tired. i am thinking about making music again, i have a lot of unfinihed songs for Maybe an album but i've been struggling with progressing after i do instrumentals.. maybe i should just do an instrumental album. my voice feels too silly to sing. i made a song in music technology class today, but the mixing and mastering is awful.. because i have to listen to it really quiet and then it's just.. umm... i'll try to fix it but doing that makes me want to give up forever. but yeah maybe i'll start working on my album again. i really prefer doing noisy music but i have to get better at the cmpositional elements and stuff, it's very hard for me to put interest like that in songs. loud music and speedcore and music like that is my favorite type of music to listen to. mostly in the background. i realized i don't like much music just because it has to be music i can walk to becasue i usually listen to music when i walk.. but when i sit down my music mood is way different like i could listen to mostly anything.. which is really strange. yesterday i was working on a bunch of my playlists and i edited a lot and added new ones and it was really fun. it makes me feel better and more excited about music.. i have a mangle character playlist i'm REALLY proud of for some reason.. well i know why it's like objectively right. it's objectively extremely accurate.. all the other mangle playlists are BAD. maybe i should make a playlist page for all of my playlists and stuff. that'd be cool but i don't know how to do it... i like to make playlists mostly based on my feelings and also nonhuman feelings i think it's really fun. i am in the process of making a playlist that is like My feelings of being a robot boy right now. and one about living in the forest but that will just be like the cure and probably industrial music and stuff.. i'm so excited to go home and listen to more loud music and interesting yippeee!!!

(Btw i am ignoring my web design teacher fo rthis blog like i love web design but oh my god this is so boring i don't even know what ypu're talking about..)

comments i get on deviantart are really funny.. like it sounds liek they're trying to annoy me but it's really funny. yesterday i posted a drawing with pictures of me beside (it was my costume for halloween) and some dude commented on it liek STOP BEING GAY and i was really confused so i said I have a girlfriend. and then he liked my comment Which leads me to believe he is confused now. So he said STOP BEING HUMAN!!! wait maybe that was about finn the human... Now i'm embarrassed about what i replied. i said YEAHH I HATE BEING HUMAN! that was silly but i just woke up when i said that. i iwant to be finn mertens sOOO BAD i have been wearing my finn hat everywhere and i look silly but it's whatever i'm too autistic to be embarrassed.

that reminds me i really want to make a photo blog page but uumm it might take a while? i'm having problems coding it. i'll post a bunch of my favorite pictures when i do it'll probably be mostly selfies or me and my gf.. or cool stuff i get. i made a writings page but i do not like the layout.. probably because it's extra simple but i prefer a bit maximalist.. there are no images or gifs woe is me... It's probably fine my brain is just ITEMS ITEMS I NEED ITEMS! OGH i forgot to talk about halloween. well my gf came and she slept over at MY hosue instead of me sleeping at hers.. i'm very self concious about my family and my house LOL. . we went trick or treating and i was finn mertens and she didn't dress up as anything well she did but not anything in specific she just did crazy makeup and clothes. my brother was a plague doctor. no one recognized me except one person. trick or treating was fun and we got a bunch of candy like so much ... I Realized i don't really like eating candy anymore.. like i always feel like what i eat has to be worth it and candy isnt that worthi t it's very not satisfying. BUT. it is still tasty i'm just picky. On the food note i made myself lunch for school today. last year i di dnot get school lunch not even once for the whole year. but this yer i started again and i do not like it it makes me feel really bad.. so i packed salad and grapes mmm tasty i love salad. when i go home i want oatmeal.. i am jsut trying to be more healthy after so much candy and stuff! healthy stuff is so much tastier than junk stuff so i duno why i still want to eat it so much.. Maybe because i have avoided it for a really long time but idk. Who nose.. i'm jsut excited to eat my salad instead of the worst mozzarella sticks ever. i think that's all i have to say for today.. GOODBYE...

have a great day